I'm really missing writing in my blog and talking to people on the internet about makeup and stuff like that. I've even talked to a few of you in person lately about wanting to write more. And I sat down tonight to maybe do a blog post about makeup, or fitness or something like that. But honestly my brain is allll jammed up from school right now and I just can't seem to pull my thoughts together and focus on any one topic. I'm not one to ever force anything, so I figured why not just write a blog about everything I'm thinking about? Cause I have a lot going through my head these days, and some of it has to do with this blog.
As you may or may not know I'm in school full time as a Political Science major. And I often want to write about my experiences as an older student, but part of me is like, who cares? It's not like I'm doing something incredible in school, I'm just an undergrad student. And even though I find the stuff I'm learning in school really fucking interesting, I'm honestly nervous about being annoying if I start talking about it on my blog. I also feel really self concious about voicing my thoughts on political issues over social media. I have an opinion about a lot of things, and the internet gives me and everyone else a platform to speak out, but does that mean that everyone should? Sometimes I feel like I should just keep my mouth shut and leave it to the real journalists.
At the same time, I'm starting to feel weird talking about makeup and beauty stuff. I mean, I'm still pretty superficial. But I spend my days learning about sweatshop labour, and climate change, and murdered indignenous women, and incarceration rates in the US-am I really going to come home and use what little voice I have to talk about lipstick? That doesn't feel quite right either. (Plus as a student I don't have as much money to spend on makeup as I did before. But that's really beside the point here.)
So I'm kind of in a weird place right now. For one thing, I'm definitely more focused on learning and taking in knowlege than I am on creating new content. But I'm also in an in-between stage I think. The things that I care about most are changing. I've got this inner conflict going on. I don't want to seem like I'm totally vapid, but I also don't know if I want to get up on a soapbox and expect people to listen to me.
As scared as I am to talk about things I really care about, I have this feeling lately that there are plenty of people who care about the world and the things going on around them. There's been a few recent major events that have gotten a lot of people talking and I hope that we can keep that up. "Giving no fucks" is so last year.
I know this hasn't been the most cohesive post ever. I just finished a really fucking boring statistics based assignment and my brain is pooched. But I wanted to get a post up and let people know where I'm at right now. And not just because I think you're all just dying to hear from me. I actually think that maybe some of you can relate to what I'm going through right now-trying to figure out what really matters to you and what you want to stand for.
And hey, remember a minute ago when I said I didn't feel right posting about lipstick? JUST KIDDING!
|My textbooks make a nice stage for my makeup.|
The drugstore near me just expanded their Nyx section and now have Butter Lipsticks and Butter Glosses. I don't even usually like lipgloss but this stuff rules. The lipstick is good too-except that it doesn't have a safety seal which is always kind of weird(gotta reach for that one waayyyy in the back). But I can teach you guys how to sanitize makeup-maybe in an upcoming makeup tips post? Cause I'm not ready to give up on all that just yet.
I'm not going to make any promises about blogging more frequently, but I want to. I have a lot of things to say, and maybe one day I'll be brave enough to say them.
As always, thanks for reading.